Wednesday, May 9, 2018

The Syntax Years 1975-76


I’m sitting in a consultation in Jurys’ Hotel Ballsbridge, its’ arranged by a Financial Adviser who specialises in representing Clients dealing with Banks. He has brought me in as the Legal Adviser, I’m grateful for any type of work. It's May 2009, Bank of Ireland is selling property as are the other banks to US Vulture funds at 10% of value, carnage on the streets as those leveraged to property as I am, are running out of road. 

Brian Lenihan TD Minister for Finance has put the brakes on family home repossessions - thank God - but there is little to be done. Our Client a middle-aged woman is in deep trouble, she owes €29M and her property portfolio is probably worth €5M on a good day. We are discussing the best options - probably Bankruptcy in the UK and quick. As the day drags on - we stop for lunch she says she is forever grateful that she sent her 2 boys to a boarding school in Kildare, at least they got a great education from the Celtic Tiger. The Accountant is from Belvo and tries to joke.....surely it wasn’t his sister school Clongowes. It was, I say nothing, other than I was there.........but deep down this is a message from above.......somehow and I just didn’t know how then.......my 3 boys would have to go to my Alma Mater.......I was praying for divine intervention or at least divine inspiration. 

The summer of 1974 whizzes by..........we were entertained no end by “Total Football” and the magical Dutch with Johan Cruyff starring........beaten by Gerd Mullers Germany in the World Cup Final in July......can’t wait to try out Cruyff’s new dribbling trick in our soccer leagues in CWC. As we arrive on the 3rd of September 1975 Rod Stewart is top of the Charts with “Sailing” - having taken over from the Bay City Rollers who held the position in July. One of the greatest songs of all time Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody is due to fill the number 1 slot for 9 weeks from November 23rd. Liverpool are due to win their 9th Division 1 title and there is some hope for Manchester United.....we had been relegated last season but come back to finish 6th in the First Division and with our loudmouth Manager Tommy Docherty at the helm, win the F A Cup.....Bliss! 

This is an important year for us.......our first major state exams.......the Inter Certificate......also for our JCT Team.......the chance to impress on the fields of Donnybrook representing the school in the Leinster Junior Cup. We win our first match against Roscrea 22-16 in Kings Hospital’s ground. Ned McQuaid, B Walker, P Mulrine and Greg all-star and the Team are welcomed home as heroes, any win in a Cup match is celebrated to the full. We lose to eventual winners Pres Bray in the quarter final - 7-5..........hindsight being a wonderful companion..........was this the signal that ‘78 would be the defining year for CWC rugby., when we would avenge this defeat and go on to bridge a 52-year gap! 

One abiding memory from the JCT match v. Pres Bray in Donnybrook, was Alan Hoban’s rugby tackle of the Pres Mascot, who dared taunt well behaved CWC supporters at half time. The tackle unleashed a crowd upset which Millwall Fans would have been proud of. Paddy Crowe SJ was not amused but we sensed that even he felt justice had been done and Alan cemented his reputation as a man not to be trifled with. 

The Monaghan - Dublin bombings of the 17th May of the previous year had severe repercussions for CWC late leave, which was the practice of allowing us to savour the delights of Dublin City until 9pm when our buses would leave from Bachelors Walk to take us home to CWC. Parents now had to sign off permission for “Late Leave” - given for JCT Cup Matches and for Internationals. My Mum was wavering - how could they be sure we would be safe, Patrick my older brother pleas with Dad “we’d be the odd ones out”, eventually won the day. Late Leave was an interesting experience - the great joy of being with friends was also coupled with the dangers of young City ruffians who were peddling O’Connell Street looking to pounce on unwary strangers opening with “give us tuppence”........once again safety in numbers was the lesson learned. 

In the days pre-McDonalds, Burger King and KFC, old style Italian chippers such as Cafollas were the taste of choice and either burger and chips or sausage and chips with extra salt and vinegar were the highlight of those late leaves. Later for SCT matches when we were in Higher Line we would be keener on a pint of Harp or Guinness and a packet of Tayto.......the hard men......would of course have insisted on Jameson chasers! 

The routine of life in Syntax was no different to Grammar. The Bell rang at 7.20am and despite Gucks in particular and other future engineers in trying to dismantle its’ shrill tones, it survived to remind us to be up for breakfast for 7.30am. Morning Study followed at 8.15am which was the last exit for chancers (myself included) to get that question or preparation for one’s most difficult class, finished. Prevarication hung heavy for all but the most studious swots - despite great study opportunities - I somehow would only complete tasks as absolutely necessary. Morning class ensues until the 11.15am break, when Dingle Moore took it on himself to dispense the morning snacks with coffee, he also had control of the supper tea/coffee snacks..........a lesson learned for a future Finance King.......control the cash at all times. Morning classes continue 11.30am to Lunch at 1pm..........the lunch stampede continuing as I understand from my 3 boys at CWC.........no generation likes to queue. Afternoon class starts at 2pm to 4pm and then the best part of the day............4-6pm Free Time for sport or other non-study/learning pursuits. Even the smokers loved this time - when they would gather for some legal nicotine prior to getting down first for Tea at 5pm. 

One memory from “the Big Study”...........Ireland were playing Russia in the European Qualifiers in 1976........those of us with radios and earphones smuggle them into Study and set about quietly tuning in to the game. All is going well, Ireland are suddenly 1 up, they go to 2, Don Givens scores a Hattrick and then a Fourth........I’m pretty sure I witnessed at least 5 super fans almost jumping with delight........the Study Prefect either Ned Carroll our kindly Latin Master or Mick O’Dowd.........were probably listening in as well. Another memory is a protest when a number of us wore “Dressing Gowns” to highlight how blooming freezing it was on occasion! 

While to the outside world - we lived in a privileged cocoon - perhaps we didn’t realize it then (as a parent, my 3 boys don’t have a clue - give them 40 years out and they will), we didn’t think so, and were always ready and willing to “best the system” if we could. One example.........overhead electric heaters were installed in our wreck room.......some Physics genius possibly “Sambo Shiel’s/Philip Murphy or 100% Hockey, discovered that those heaters could be used to make toast. The smell of toast is alluring and quickly we all want some of that. Even Con Clifford gets up for breakfast once toast is available. You needed to work in pairs, 1 on the lookout and the other making toast. Titch Kelly and myself are working away until Chris Murphy SJ, breaks our radar system and confiscates our contraband! Despite Titch’s pleas “can I have some more Sir”! 

Dingle, Morgan, Henno Donnelly and myself discovered that we had a love of 2 things that young gentlemen should probably avoid, poker and horses. In later life I put all my misfortune down to “slow horses and fast women!". We mis-spent many a Wednesday and Saturday afternoon, losing our pocket money to the bookies in Clane! In terms of Poker, Dingle was the maestro and no matter what hand I had, on one deal, I had a straight flush and Dingle comes in with a Royal straight flush........I recall it was the first hand dealt in that session.......he always won! A big learning........the house always wins. 

One of my abiding memories of a great time at CWC was during the Inter Cert exams. Most of Syntax left after about 10 days of exams, as I was taking a minority subject “Spanish” - I had an extra week of great weather and time to wallow in the splendour of the college. No rules - it truly was a holiday venue extraordinaire. I didn’t do much if any study and spent the endless hours, playing soccer, tennis, tip rugby, swimming and eating pretty much what I wanted as the skeleton catering staff felt sorry for us teenagers who had been left behind. 

Mocky Sheil kindly allowed me access to the Clongownian for 1975/76 and the following are excerpts that hopefully sum up what fellow 15-year olds were accomplishing in 1975: 

James (TC) Kelly was awarded first place in the senior Feis Ceoil. Drama talent was exhibited by “The Apprentices” our year end play starring Freddie, Jack Ronan and David Kelly, who according to the Clongownian “exhibited India Rubber resilience as “the New Apprentice”. Our Christmas debate theme was “That the era of Democracy is ended”....D J Hegarty led the opposition ably assisted by Ambrose. John Hickey’s Team win the Syntax Quiz and he has Con Clifford, Martin Moloney and Greg to thank for winning by a point! Rossa (our esteemed editor of this blog and organiser in Chief of our forthcoming re-union) and Rory are complimented for their Orienteering aptitude. Joe Prendiville bags the medal for Lower Line Debate. There are also plaudits for C Hickey and F McEnroy for their prowess in canoes. Peter Howick, who goes on to become one of Ireland’s finest journalists scores 1 of his many well-deserved Medals for English - he is peerless amongst us as a writer and wit! Gucks wins one of his All Irelands. 

It’s the May bank holiday and my editor Rossa wants this delivered for Tues. 7th May, so I need to sign off. Till next month - continuing the theme ‘born in 1960 and made in CWC.


If you have any stories that now need airing please contact whistleblowercwc72@gmail.com
in the STRICTEST confidence ;)


Thursday, April 12, 2018

Back to the Place I Was Before


The 40th Reunion since the Leaving Certificate also marks the end of the schooldays and falls this year for the Graduating class of 1978. So, a Class Reunion offers that rare return to Clongowes Wood College for many of that graduating class. As well as a trip back to a place that at one point all of us thought we would never escape perhaps. Yet with the passage of time it has become the place we now feel that we left too quickly. 


The occasion this year offers another chance to meet fellow class mates from the 1972 vintage and recall times inside those imaginary Gates of Hell up to the hazy the summer of 1978 when we departed for the last time as pupils. A place where most served the full six years before taking our leave to chase life’s great adventure. For those who never had further family attending the school it may all seem less familiar now if they never returned. With some sparkling new buildings and modern facilities now on show, as there have been significant changes since even our last return a decade ago. 

The formal gathering will take place on Saturday, October 20th, 2018 with former teachers, members of the Jesuit Community and many past pupils. All of whom will gather in the Westgrove Hotel and Conference Centre, in Abbeylands, Clane, Co. Kildare. 

"Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
'Relax' said the night man,
'We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
But you can never leave!'
Hotel California - the Eagles


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Tuesday, April 3, 2018

Grammar..... Monopoly, Battleships, Chess and RISK


The New CWC swimming pool was due to open on the 3rd March 2018. As a former Leinster dual swimming silver medalist - I’m trying to pawn off to my boys George (Syntax) and Patrick (Grammar) that I have a special invite but the truth is all parents of current pupils are invited. The opening is postponed as the Storm “Beast of the East” strikes and CWC sends all boys who can go home - home. On the drive home I casually ask the boys what they think of the new state of the art pool - I am horrified to hear the answer “Dad the new pool is no fun - in the old pool we can wrestle, mess and hang out - the new pool is just for serious swimming”.............youth is wasted on the young....we would have killed for a pool like this in 1973.

It is the 4th September 73 - summer is over and CWC opens its doors for our 2nd year experience. A massive change Mr O’Keefe is no longer our Prefect he has been replaced by a bearded scholastic Mr O’Riordan......he is smaller and doesn’t invoke the fear that Mr O’K did. Rules are relaxed or is it that we are now veterans of the system. Bounds are no longer enforced - it seems we can go anywhere - and we are allowed into Clane, freedom beckons.

On the academic front - I am particularly relieved, I have been re-assigned from Latin into Spanish class. A shot at redemption.......I seize it with both arms.....Spanish becomes my favorite subject.......I just can’t let this opportunity pass me by.....there is a joy and sense of accomplishment in learning......it feels good. On my Halloween exams I get my first 2 placecards (having been light years away from any academic achievement in Rudiments) 2nd in Spanish (the Editor is fluent so no contest) and 2nd in Ray Lawlor’s French.........a life lesson.....love what you do and/or do what you love......the recipe for success.

We are provided with a set of new Board games and a new wreck room. There is Monopoly, Battleships, Chess and an unknown game of RISK.......Gucks becomes an addict and word spreads that the best entertainment during evening break 8-9pm is to watch Gucks at Risk.........his expletives are the bluest of the blue and blasphemy reigns when the dice goes against him! Live theater at its’ finest.

This is the year that the ESB Unions decide to go on strike for better pay for their workers. CWC doesn’t have its’ own generator and “blackouts” reign. We can’t believe our luck - study periods in the evening are wiped out. We are free to roam and use the excuse that we couldn’t finish our homework. Bliss for the average student, a category that I fitted into comfortably. Torches were the currency of the day and everyone somehow scrounged, begged or stole them - they were now essential hardware for CWC power cut imperiled students.

On the Sporting Front - none of our U14’s are called up to join the elite - those who will represent the school in the Leinster Schools Rugby JCT Competition. The school apparently have a good Team for the first time in many years and are fancied to go far under Percy Winder SJ & Vinny Murray - disaster strikes in the form of a 16 points to 6 defeat against Mary's.

Our under 14 Soccer Team trained initially by Barney Cullen our Geography Teacher begins to make some progress, but Barney is waylaid by a broken ankle. Vinny Murray steps in. We win a couple of matches and progress smoothly to the semi-final which is held in Newbridge College a neutral ground. We are up against Bono’s school “Mount Temple”......we are not a soccer school.....but against all the odds and coached brilliantly by Vinny, we squeeze into the Leinster Schools Final section A. The Final is held at Tolka Park - the home of Bohemians......we are living our First Division Hero’s life-style. I learn 2 life-lessons - the pain of getting dropped - which I was for the Final, Wally and myself are demoted to subs. I get on for the 2nd half - Vinny insists that I have to turn the game around.....I play well.....I’m the best dribbler in CWC but to no avail, we lose 2-0. The dressing room hurts, Mike, Eoin, Gerry, Johnny, Doggo, Greg......all of us are hurting....what could have been........a Loser’s medal is a huge achievement for a non-soccer school but it wasn’t enough. Another Life Lesson - Sometimes - “almost isn’t enough”.


Jake Brennan SJ - Rector of the school takes it upon himself to get to know each and every one of us. He decides that he will speak Mano a Mano to all individuals in Grammar/Syntax. He is also likely to be around every corner - 2 incidents - where fellow students were caught unawares. 1. Tigger was heard telling a joke and Jake after the punchline is delivered exclaims to our assembled group “what makes an O’Beirne joke even better is a few FUXXX’s thrown in” 2. An unfortunate year member was caught with the latest edition of “Hustler or Penthouse”, which were being rented out by an enterprising CWC Grammar Student who is now a prominent Financier/Banker. Jake enquired “how would you like to see your mother like this!” Not only did the unfortunate student have the embarrassment of Jake’s talking down - he had to cough up a Fiver (a King’s ransom in 1974)- to replace the confiscated Magazine.........

We all dread Jake Brennan’s five minutes, probably well intentioned questions about how we are getting on, what would we like to get from CWC, what profession do we think we would like to aspire to..........all too heavy for young adolescents trying to survive the CWC experience. The dreaded day arrives Jake joins Michael Dolan and myself for Tea - Dolan somehow escapes and I’m left about to be interrogated......thankfully its’ 5.50pm........saved by the Bell as I protest I really need to get ready for Study. Jake says he will catch up with me again........not if I can help it.......he never did!

Boarding school had its’ upsides and downsides as does life. There were dreaded classes where you learned to hide and/or at least diminish the odds of getting scrutinized. Ben Sherry’s Chemistry class was probably the ultimate Machiavellian theatre of fear for those not blessed with an aptitude for Science. Ben had the amazing ability of bestowing the Grandest Titles on those who had the least ability. So for example Professor - the highest accolade was placed on the shoulders of only a handful of non geniuses - currently one of Ireland’s leading Medical Practitioners, and another Senior Counsel who shall remain nameless, fitted this title. You all know where you stood with Ben. I was in the middle category and bestowed with the title Dr Fitzpatrick. The real brains were the Mr category. Two other things that Ben consistently did was to (I) reward students with his jellybeans/sweets and (2) make us answer as a Group to his beat......to show we were awake. In relation to the latter hard to describe in writing.......you had to be there....he would knock out a beat on his desk and we would answer with our feet!

We all had our favorite classes, mine were languages but of all I lived for PE/Sports with Vinny Murray - generally it was my time to excel - while I languished in the bottom of Physics and Maths - this made up for it as some of the Geeks just hated PE - justice at last. Just behind PE was English - I was gratefully demoted from Gerry Lynch’s English 1 to English 2. It was bliss Bertie Brereton SJ was a true Gentleman and Scholar. He encouraged his students to love the language - he suggested that we did “freelance” - unheard of in any other class. I couldn’t grasp what he was suggesting - that I should do “extra homework for the love of it”.......madness! By term 2 - I had bought in - I could write about my favorite topics “George Best, Manchester United, horse-racing”.......he would read it and mark it. Berties class was so far away from Ben Sherry’s Theatre of Fear, that arguably the Pendulum had swung too far........there was no control.......it was laissez faire.........surprisingly I occasionally wished for a bit of discipline. Ray Lawlor’s French class was probably the right mix enough discipline but no fear.

The CWC shop was legendary - the only retail store in History - which lost more money than Mugabe’s Zimbabwe. The shop was run by Oggy Doggy SJ with a handful of Poetry Helpers. If you had the right connection with the Helper - your 10 shillings could yield far more bounty than it paid for. Ultimately Mr Crabtree took over the shop and dispensed with both Oggy Doggy and his Helpers - returning the premises to Profit within a day. The system had caught up!

Lunch queues were another of Grammar’s abiding memories. In order to facilitate the orderly doling out of lunch to 350 students, Oggy Doggy would summon Grammar classes for lunch 5 mins early, as part of a staggered system between the year groups. Despite much protestation from Oggy Doggy as he roared “walk please” - an absolute stampede would break out with Sambo Shields (who had never run for a rugby ball), Gucks, Country, Freddy all of us sprinting for the line.......another life lesson, if everyone is breaking the law, you best be there first.

Young Adolescents are full of testosterone and unfortunately one of the side effects was the number of fights (Claims) that broke out. Conor McGregor would have been at home in some of those claims - they always gathered an audience and were part of the growing up process. I personally partook in a couple of minor events and my opponents know who they are. The Big Claims are legendary - and consigned to the archive of life’s experience at school. The major participants in these crowd drawing duels were probably Burns, Healy, Waldron C, Hoban, Tempany........apologies to participants who aren’t remembered. In some ways the Jesuits turned their backs, possibly in an enlightened way. Similar to the story Warren Garland tells about the ALL BLACKS famous coach Alex “Grizz” Wylie - who almost encouraged/facilitated the younger players in attempting to take the established players’ seats at the Back of the Team Bus. Perhaps another life lesson you had to know how to take care of yourself!

Corporal punishment still had 2 years to run until the new era of Fogarty/Shiels dispensed with it. Our Poetry Study Prefects could write “Cheques” which we had to exchange with either the HeadMaster Fr. Crowe SJ or one of the Scholastics/Brothers such as O’Riordan or Br Ward. In essence depending on the offense committed, 2, 4 or 6 hits with the Pandy Bat could be ordered. It was only when I became a prefect in Poetry myself that I understood the value of such a deterrent system. That said - King Carrot (Niall King our Prefect) could be unreasonable and write a cheque at will. Barney Cullen kicked me out of Geography class and unfortunately I ran into an eager HeadMaster who gave me 4 of the best and returned me to class. Our Spanish Teacher, my grand-uncle “The Raz” carried his Pandy Bat with him for ease of use. That said his more favored method of discipline was a knuckle to the head. This I experienced on a couple of occasions and definitely agree a Pandy strike to the hand was preferable. My three boys one of whom finished CWC last June - see these implements of torture only in the CWC museum and it is with a misplaced sense of almost pride that I can tell my boys that we were the last pupils in CWC who experienced Corporal Punishment.

That is all for now as we await Sunday’s big game Leinster v Saracens - another installment “Syntax 1974/5” is a mere month away as I continue on the theme of Born in 1960 - made in CWC.

Contributed by Francis Fitzpatrick OC'78


The opinions expressed in our published works are those of the author(s) and do not reflect the opinions of Clongowes 1978 or its Editor. 

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Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Clongowes - The Early Days


In 1171 Strongbow granted most of North Kildare to his friend and companion Adam de Hereford. However, in 1317 the de Hereford lands reverted to the Crown and were granted to Sir John Wogan of Rathcoffey, then Lord Deputy of Ireland, by Edward II. The name Clongowes Wood comes from the hybrid Latin/Irish: silva, wood; cluain, meadow; gobha, smith; i.e. the wood of the meadow of the smith

From the Wogans the Clongowes land passed to the Eustace family who built a castle there in 1450. Originally this was a Pale castle built to protect the English frontier from incursions by the Irish clans in search of cattle and plunder. The Pale was first proposed in 1435 as a result of a report to the English king that it was only in the area around Dublin, ‘that a man might safely go to answer the king’s writ and to do his commandments.’

The actual Pale rampart was to consist of a bank, six feet high surrounded by a double ditch. The top of the bank was to be flat and wide enough to serve as a footpath, a bridle path or even a road in some places. There are two well-preserved stretches of the Pale boundary on Clongowes land. The first section begins at the east gate of the present farmyard and runs for nearly 500 yards to the lane at Rathcoffey. The second and best known section, between Clongowes and Capdoo Commons, starts in the grounds of the College just south west of the castle and runs for over half a mile from north-west to south-east towards the Gollymochy river, perhaps intending to make the river part of the defence.

As a result of the Eustace involvement in the 1641 Rising the Cromwellian General Monck attacked and blew up the castle at Clongowes, and their lands were forfeited. In July 1667 the property was granted to Richard Reynall, who promptly sold the castle and 1000 acres to Thomas Browne, a Dublin barrister, for £2,100. The Brownes and their near neighbours, the Wogans of Rathcoffey, were Catholics and the two families intermarried – hence the family name Wogan Browne. It was Browne who changed the name to Castle Browne, by which it was known until 1814, when it was changed back to Clongowes by the Jesuits.

In 1718 Stephen Fitzwilliam Browne rebuilt the castle completing the western façade (front) just as it is today, comprising the central keep and the two square towers. In 1788 Thomas Wogan Browne extended and decorated the castle. The extension consists of the eastern façade and two round towers at the back of the castle all built in the Georgian style. Both building phases are recorded in the Latin inscription incised on the lintel over the hall-door of the castle beneath the Wogan Browne Coat of Arms.

Thomas Wogan Browne died in 1812 and his younger brother, General Michael Wogan Browne, who was helping Napoleon at the siege of Moscow, inherited the property. When he returned to Ireland on hearing of his brother’s death, he found the estate heavily in debt and sold the castle and 219 acres to Fr Peter Kenney SJ in March 1814 for £16,000.

This material is largely taken from A Short History of Clongowes Wood College, which was privately published in 2011 by Mr Brendan Cullen, a local historian and formerly teacher of history in Clongowes (1971-2007). It is reproduced here by kind permission of the author.


Thursday, February 22, 2018

Rudiments 1972



Taking up Rossa’s challenge I have decided to write a memoir every month between now and October so that prior to our re-union I will have addressed our 6 years. Presumably fellow 78’ers will be too busy to review and/or respond - so I am going to take some artistic license - hopefully anyone who bothers to read will not be too severe a critic and/or be over offended, these are my memories which have over the years blurred some-what but the core hopefully remains authentic. 

On the 28th August 2011 - I am driving down the main entrance to CWC, hallowed turf, in the back of the car is our eldest son Daniel. No tears of loneliness on his face, he is so excited to be going to Clongowes- just anxious to be left in boarding school. Harry Potter has glamorised the experience Hollywood style - he is totally oblivious to Dad’s final messages, you may be homesick, don’t forget to play golf it’s the only game you will use when you are my age.......he just wants in..... Clongowes is his new home. My wife Denise has heard from other Mums that she should spray her Chanel no. 5 on his duvet when she makes up his bed to remind him of his Mum tucking him in..........a world away from our entrance in September 1972 - Mum’s were not allowed in the dorms and certainly not encouraged to make school a “home from home” for their precious boys. 

Daniel is assigned Brendan Rumley’s old cube..........my own cube 40 years previously was opposite. A strange moment but no time to dwell..........Daniel wants to head out as soon as possible to the new Vinny Murray 4G all-weather pitch to play football with the other new boys......I am greeted by Tony Egan Lower Line Prefect who tells Mr Wright the Elements Prefect that I was an OC......this seems to illicit some small level of respect vis a vis other Dads who are just blow-ins. There are no Jesuits - the last CWC recruit to the J’s came about 15 years ago........only Fr Moloney, Fr Bradley and Mocky Sheil remain, the latter the only OC......to man the fort 

The torch has now been passed to my son Dan........Clongowes 2011 is a different country, thoughts now return to 1972 as we start our CWC journey in rudiments..........yes I was excited that first evening......I had already spent 6 years in boarding school and six or so from Killashee primary are on the Rudiments journey with me, Gerry Healy, Ciaran Hickey, Michael Dolan, Paul Moran, Sean Wong, Matthew Byrnes.......there is strength in numbers.......but also a great desire to mingle with new friends. Goodness I can’t fathom how big Paddy Lawlor is, Mark Collis, Barry Walker........these guys are giants.......and then John Hickie appears.....he is already shaving......hope I don’t end up doing tackling training in rugby with him........my worst fears are confirmed.......my partner for training is Hickey......a star on whom the U13’s would depend firmly on for the season. At this point of growing up - I am tiny and don’t grow till O Levels. 

I must have done OK in the entrance exam in English I am assigned to class 1, not so well in Maths or Irish where I languish in class 3, which was probably a fairer reflection of where I should have been. English unfortunately determines that I am in class 1 for Latin where I am thrown in with geniuses like Sambo Shields and Philip Murphy..........no place to hide......I like the warrior spirit of the Romans but not their language - give me Mandarin any day having had prep school in Hong-Kong. 

The boarding school routine suits well - rise at 7.20am with a reminder bell at 7.30am - on day 12 approximately I sleep through until woken by Fr O’Keefe [ein deutsches Wort wurde verwendet] - he reminds me that next time I sleep in the Pandy bat awaits..........unfortunately this happens by end of November......2 of the best.......discipline for a lifetime is being built brick by brick by the CWC machine. 

Those first few weeks were a haze.......there was one entrant I remember him as John Byrne.......he cried for 7 days........his parents come to collect him and bring him back, he hasn’t settled in CWC......its’ not for everyone 

One of the highlights of the day is post - great to receive a letter from parents hopefully for us non-Irish residents with some cash which we can spend in Oggy Doggy’s shop which opens at lunchtime......birthdays are known......and bumps distributed. We are all in this together.

Fr O’Keefe is a disciplinarian - we learn off by heart our bounds......”rudiments bounds include inside the front of the castle extending as far as the pleasure grounds....to the infirmary..............Joyce has written about this in Portrait of the Artist.........I can’t remember the boundaries.........just box clever and keep a look out for [_______] when I leave the main concourse. Punishment is writing the 12 lines boundary rules out over 100 times - takes days Country O’Mahony and David Tempany have already infringed. I soon learn that there is a difference in infringing and getting caught infringing.......another life lesson dispensed early in CWC. 

We split into different 1st Division loyalties - I am part of the Manchester United gang, surprisingly West Ham are well represented Noddy and Tigger.....Mr O’Shea.....our Jesuit scholastic realizes how sport unites and organizes the Rudiments soccer leagues. I am a captain and try and select the best players, Greg Dilger or Freddie Browne but don’t get lucky on the draw - our team is severely depleted. The highlight of each league day is Mr O’Shea writing up a “match of the day report’ on the game he referees. In my case we get beaten 4-1 but I get written up as scoring the best goal of the game. Another learning.........self-esteem is important even when you lose. 

The major sporting memory of Rudiments is the infamous “Commancheros” team. A sports psychologist could spend his entire career trying to understand and explain this phenomenon. An entire season of going beaten, a 100% record of failure - but was it. Could this be our equivalent of the “Shawshank Redemption”? On further investigation - perhaps the smartest move of all. A collection of non- sporting -smokers/hard men [Questionable reference – Editor] - having a laugh at the system. The jury is still out. With arch smoker Denis Aldritt at the helm ably assisted by TC Kelly, Tommy Owens, Titch Kelly, Rossa McDermott......perfect......an opportunity to have a few fags at leisure.......while obeying the rules. Sparrow Harte is to be pitied a potential “Messi” of his day, labouring amongst a group of misfits! 

We also play rugby leagues - I am chosen by Barry Walker who uses all his main picks for forwards, our other backs are made up of C Hickey and others who are more comfortable in a canoe than on a rugby pitch - once our forwards lose the ball we are sunk...........I learn a major skill - kick to touch when in trouble. 

A major humiliation comes my way in week 4........Percy Winder decides that I should become “Sacristan” .............I beg him to reconsider........this is the ultimate no-go area for a kid trying to put up a cool, sports type front. He insists. However, there is a benefit - I become a tack - we have extra time off and can indulge in indoor soccer, snooker - leisure time is extended for the tacks by no study once a week. 

I try out for the swimming team with Gerry Healy, and Mike McManus - we all beat the required times and are admitted. Our privilege permits us to go swimming training - laborious, monotonous, building a skill/talent.......another life lesson. 

There is a Subbuteo tournament organised - Wally Waldron and myself progress to the final.........its’ looking good till Noddy and Rory Gray annihilate us and win the prize......learning to accept defeat graciously.......another lesson. 

Mr Crabtree starts the chess club and photography society, there’s even an ornithologist society and Birdie Shannon has found his vocation.........there is room for all of us, no-one is excluded. Although when a few of us tried to gate crash the cake night for the Photography society......DJ Hegarty wasn’t having it........we hadn’t been members.......Gate crashing another life-skill learned at CWC.......probably in the top 5 learnings that have stood to me in life.

The Jesuits are insistent on competition and peer pressure - after the Halloween exams a list of names is put up - we have all been graded from number 1 first, down to number 72 last, some prominent present day senior Counsel, Doctors, Engineers all fill the last 10 spots. There is nowhere to hide, not only do you know your place in academia - so do your 71 other peers!

We were blessed by a dedicated team of Carers’ in Rudiments 72, led by disciplinarian Fr O’Keeffe SJ, assisted ably by Scholastic Mr O’Shea and Br Ward........whatever we think of our Team of carers I genuinely believe they were doing their best. 

One bit of early entrepreneurial spirit was Clive Waldron’s shop which he ran from his tightly locked closet in our dorm - he sold Cadbury bars, crisps and sweets at highly inflated prices - earning a nice living at the expense of constantly starving teenagers. Selling is easy if you have scarcity and a captive audience - perhaps another learning. 

I was never part of Br Ward’s favourites - didn’t make the cut. I narrowly escaped a high level Pandy Bat punishment. There was pandemonium in our dorm one night - water bombs were being fired in all directions. Fr O’Keeffe came to investigate and promised severe retribution to those who didn’t own up. I decided to take my chances. O’Keeffe was certain I had fired a bomb into B Rumley’s cube as the evidence seemed clear from where the bomb landed. Brother Joe was brought in to verify and using his mammoth torch he shined same from my tap toward the ground in my cube surveying for drops of water, evidence of building the bombs. I had used very thick paper - the bomb didn’t leak.............the Pandy Bat was reluctantly put away! Another learning...........sometimes you have to take a risk and stick with it! 

So, there we go - I’m in Miami 21 Feb. 2018 watching Man U (still a fan) v. Sevilla 0-0, finishing this memoir on Rudiments 1972...........till next month........remember we were born in 1960 and made in CWC 72-78! 

Written and produced by Francis Fitzpatrick

*The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in the text belong solely to the author, and not necessarily to the author’s employer, organisation, committee or other group or individual.Or indeed the CROC

**Some names and places have been changed or withheld. Any errors, corrections or amendments please contact clongowes1978@gmail.com